On My Own

I’m the kind of person who prefers working with people, regardless of the situation. There is always greater benefit to be had if you are part of a team, and that applies to literally everyone in life. Unfortunately, a sad truth we all know about life is that …. people suck.

The majority of people I’ve met in life, acquaintances, friends, and family alike, will only associate with you if they believe they have great profit to gain from doing so. Most people are not like me. This sad fact has come around over and over, reminding me of its very existence, for all my life, and I still have tried to pretend people are better than this.

In 2017, I started a company that produces art in all its various forms, which includes writing, photography, illustrations, etc. Since beginning, I’ve attempted to either join forces with, or work alongside various people and other companies. They all had 2 things in common: they appreciated my business, and in their own unique way told me to fuck off after our business had concluded. I found that interesting, because whenever there was a business transaction of any kind with these people, I made my appointments on time, I made my payments in full and on time, and I was kind, dressed modestly, and acted professional the entire time. I was thanked for my business, and even thanked for being more professional than people they usually deal with. One guy, whose name was also Michael, even brought up the idea of working with me completely on his own. Additionally, I offered to work for him to any extent he needed for 3 months entirely for free. And on top of that as well, I offered to give him additional business out of my own pocket throughout 2018. What did he do in the end? Blow me off, just like the others… No reason given, no heads up. He just cut all contact. All of the people/entities I’ve done business with have been very similar. What the hell?

Sure, this annoys me immensely, but more than that, it confuses me. It just seems incredibly stupid. But since this keeps happening with consistency, I’m going to voice my complete honest opinion of it all. Even if I was someone who couldn’t tell the difference between a crayon and a marker, this would still be profoundly idiotic on their part. Who turns down free assistance?

So, it seems I’m alone. I’ve learned that I can’t rely on working alongside established small businesses for growth or even word-of-mouth.

But I’m not completely alone…

I can still rely on those who I call family. People like my best friend, my wife and all of her relatives, and a couple of friends. Sure, none of them (except my wife) are in the same kind of industry that I’m trying to get into, but they can, and are willing to, do whatever they can to help. When I first brought up my idea for starting a company to my wife’s family, without hesitation they provided us with a small amount of funding to start up. The problem is: I hate accepting that kind of help from people in my life that I like, even if I work for it. Even as a kid, I hated being hired by friends and family to simply mow their lawn or pull weeds. I had technically earned payment, but I still hated taking the money. One of my goals in life is to make money for loved ones, not take it for any reason.

With this blog, since it changed from being personal to being strictly art-related, I have attempted to restrain from doing anything that could be deemed non-family-friendly, but for one, it always felt uncomfortable because I like sometimes using foul language and I don’t like watering down my art simply to appeal to as many people as possible. I want this blog, and my company, and all the works in between to be real, to come from the heart, and for art to take priority over appeal. Being more tame than I naturally am didn’t work, and being willing to stretch myself for others to earn their favor didn’t work either. So, fuck it. Time to keep it real. I’m going solo, so I may as well enjoy myself. If a repulsive person like Donald Trump can be elected leader of the free world, I’m sure me being myself won’t do any severe damage to my life as a writer/photographer/future-filmmaker.

The image used for this article’s cover was taken by my wife. I think it’s pretty fantastic. So, maybe we don’t need outside support from the industry anyway. Maybe going solo won’t be such a bad thing.

If you’d like to support this blog, or my Summer 2018 photography project, you can donate $1 or more per month to my Patreon here.


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